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Bitterness is unescapable; unchangeable. No matter how long it has been when it first developed, no matter how many times one has said they have gotten over it or forgiven the other person, it will always be there.
As humans, we say “forgive and forget”, and as a result, we give into forgiveness to avoid encountering that situation again, yet we will always remember. We remember not on purpose, and sometimes it makes us either sad or angry. It might not be because one still has hatred towards the other person, it is the stress and frustration of opening what is already dead and remembering all the emotions, questions, and thoughts going through their mind at that time. Thoughts of “why?” and “how come?” could lead to opening very unhealthy nonexistent doors that are connected to what you think might be wrong with yourself.
Just to make it clear, “being bitter” is a derogatory statement defining a person as being controlled by bitterness, whereas “bitterness” can be possessed either to affect your lifestyle or let it help us for the better.
Does not matter how small or tiny it is, it is still something everyone goes through and has, and it is okay as long as you have power over it. It is your decision to make bitterness a weakness or a friend. Your choice is to either let it affect you in a negative way, or remember what made you stronger from it. So stay strong, do not let anything stand in your way, because God gave you those storms to make who you are today.
Love, Christianne xx
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Hey guys, it is way too long since the last time I blogged, and I finally have time to and will continue to take advantage of it because summer is coming up where I plan to do numerous exciting things.:) As some of you already know, I am graduating-in eleven days-and these few months have flown by dramatically; not at all in being emotionally drained in a way but who knew you could learn quite a lot from a few short months.
Becoming An Adult
I would not quite say I am technically a “real” adult yet, because I am still trying to figure how the real world functions, and so far it looks captivating yet a tiny bit overwhelming. You have to take up new responsibilities, and before you enter a path where your life begins, you need to know exactly how and every turn you are going to enter.
University is a huge thing for me, and lately, it is what I plan on to attend right away. No, I am not being forced to attend it right away, I want to. Honestly, I do not want to waste time, and of course want to get my degree. I want a path that would pave me a way to get that opportunity and teach me how to get my dream career professionally.
If everything works out, that would be awesome, but if something crosses my path where going there right away is not God’s timing, then there are tons of opportunities I am also interested in including having a year dedicated to traveling and auditioning or maybe even setting up a YouTube channel. “Why can’t you start right now?” Right now, life has been hectic, and I plan to get things out of the way and start off with a clean slate, because that is just me being the way I want things to be. As I realized before, God gave us not only one specific talent to glorify Him with, but numerous, so take advantage of all of them. Take advantage of all the opportunities He gives you and experience life.
Isn’t It Ironic?
Theme song of my life^^
Okay, that was a tiny bit over exaggerating but I did have some ups and downs these past few months; we all do. I am actually, quite shocked of how I handled them. To be honest, up to this day, I am still trying to figure out what emotion I was feeling. The words expressed were not ‘angry’ or ‘sad’; it is just “____”.
There were times of regret and when I did feel like I should of been more careful and should of took things more seriously, but when bad things happen, and there is nothing you can do about it, we need to just move on or, if we can, try again, because letting those things control your life and put you in a uncomfortable position should not stop you from being happy or chasing your dreams. Ironic things happen to mature you and save you for the better opportunities God has in store for your life.
Now of course, that does not mean bomb things on purpose; poor passion is a poor direction, and life will be so much harder for you when you start out like that. Does not mean you cannot achieve that goal, but it is going to be way more difficult to get back up.
There will be people that hate you. Sometimes for no reason at all. Not anything you do to them, they just do not like you. Some of them, are secretly your so-called “true friends”, adults, anyone. Dealing with them is your decision; are you going to let them win or let them know you are secure. ?
I have learned a long time ago to value trust and keep it to yourself until you find the right people to commit to. Sad to say, I have not found anyone aside from my mother, family, another mentor I have, and a friend who is out of state. Just be ready to let go when people walk out of your life. Let people know you can continue to stay independent. Real friends do not sabotage you, try to tear you down, always treat everything like it is a competition, and constantly drain you with their negative attitude. The true ones are the ones that lift you up, encourage you to see the brighter side of life, and wishes you the best. Luckily, I was prepared. X
Obviously this did not happen yet, but I would say I have high expectations. Summer 2014-first year I get out of high school is going to be amazing. I cannot wait to get out there, officially have more opportunities to try new things, meet new people, and experience a new chapter of my life.
Thank you for reading:) Hopefully this post would help someone if they are going through the same or similar things I am going through right now and it impacted someone’s life in some way. I forgot how much of a relief It feels to be blogging and expressing my thoughts. If you guys have any questions about anything, advice, my life, or etc. feel free to ask me in my ask box. Love you guys, and may you have a lovely summer. xx
Love, Christianne xx